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Although only one letter apart, the WMC (Winter Music Conference) and WMD (Weapons of Mass Destruction) have one huge difference: The marathon dance music festival that runs Saturday through Wednesday will inflict massive destruction only on your hearing and ability to function after experiencing six nonstop days and nights of partying. Where the alleged WMD have been thus far as elusive as Osama, the WMC is as ubiquitous as Tara Reid at an open bar. Events will be taking place everywhere, including I/O ( Dmitri of Paris spins on Monday) and Nikki Beach (also on Monday) where, although the headliners are DJs Saeed and Palash, hostess Paris Hilton will undoubtedly steal some of the sonic thunder. Same goes for the party there the following night when DJs will attempt to spin while Rok Bar owner Tommy Lee hosts. Expect the same types of insanity to ensue absolutely everywhere else, from Opium and Mansion to BED, Rumi, Skybar, State (where, on Wednesday, DJ Peretz, aka Perry Farrell, will spin), crobar and pretty much anywhere with a decent sound system and a well-stocked bar. Meanwhile, DJs, dance divas and celebrity hosts won't go hungry considering the WMC falls the same week as the South Beach Wine and Food Festival, where chefs are the real stars, and partying isn't as rare as the seared tuna on your plates. Tonight, Circoc Vodka hosts a party at the Sagamore Hotel, beginning sometime after 11 p.m., where there will be an opportunity for everyone to take their pricey shoes off and stomp on some grapes by the pool, a refreshing change from the unpleasant visual of club brats stomping their feet when denied immediate entrance into a place. The following night, foodies and winos will continue their orgiastic behavior at the Bentley Beach Hotel for a party hosted by Cigar Aficionado at 11 p.m., featuring the delightful scent of cigars wafting amid shots of El Tesoro de Don Felipe tequila. Because The William Morris Agency is repping the festival, a slew of celebs including the glammy Ivana Trump will be flying in. As if DJs, wine and food weren't enough, someone had to throw into the mix an event called Funkshion, groan, yet another Miami fashion week, also happening Sunday through Wednesday. Tents will be pitched on First and Ocean and will feature endless fashion shows that will have the same effect on people as Fashion Television, only instead of sitting on their couches in a haze of oblivion, fashion zombies will be right smack under the tents. Perhaps all this concentration and fixation on fashion has led Miami to be voted a lame sixth in AOL City Guide's top 10 cities for dancing. New York, L.A., D.C., Philadelphia and frigid Chicago beat us and that, frankly, is insulting. We demand a recount. One explanation for this paltry rating is perhaps that the poll included West Palm Beach, Fort Lauderdale and the Keys. For those who voted Philadelphia over Miami, check out Mansion on Saturday night and then tell us who has the best dancing. Mansion is a spectacular display of dancing, lounging and people watching, where models, more models and the rest of us mingle with the likes of Roy and Lea Black, Vince Neil and his bevy of Pamela Anderson look-alikes. It's the place to go for your 15 minutes of fame -- or infamy. If you aren't spotted at Mansion anytime soon, your absence will undoubtedly be your own social WMD. Go tonight and see DJ Maxwell spin a live set beginning at 1 a.m. On Tuesday, Paris Hilton and Simple Life costar Nicole Richie will be there to celebrate the launch of Hilton's ``recording career.'' And finally, apologies to Opium's marketing director David Grutman, who was referred to in this column as a ''celebrity wrangler.'' What we meant to say was that celebrities wrangle to get an invite from him. Not the other way around. |
